What is going on? Seriously, what? Go to sleep, NFL. You’re drunk.

NO Fins NO!

I really have no words for what I’m seeing here. The Chiefs essentially beat us with 5 yard passes. They didn’t have to do much of anything else; we provided the poor offensive effort, the lack of motivation on defense, the poor coaching. The embarrassment of losing to a team on the ropes in our home stadium is still settling in. Hopefully it passes by the time we’re beating the Raiders in London.

Did I just jinx us?

Bench Tannehill. Maybe it’ll wake him up. Too much potential (and time in the pocket) to be performing so poorly.

What is going on?

So much. So little of it makes sense. September in the NFL is essentially 32 auctions being played out…all at the same time.

The chaos. The madness. The stuff we live for.

As it was happening, you almost couldn’t believe how good the Falcons were on Thursday night.

Until you realized how bad Tampa Bay were, and are. In that context, 56 doesn’t necessarily seem like a ridiculous score. But it is, and was.

Kudos to Devin Hester, a record I don’t think we’ll see broken for a long time. Especially if he pads it a little more before he hangs it up.

Sunday provided me so many “wat.” moments that I haven’t been able to keep tabs on them all. These stick out:

-The Bills losing. I know they’re good enough to beat the Chargers, they just didn’t play like it.

-Baltimore beating Cleveland. How many more games before the fight is kicked out of the Browns? And how are the Ravens going to handle not having Dennis Pitta for another season?

-Green Bay scores seven. I don’t care if they’re playing the Seahawks in Seattle, this isn’t an offense you expect to play like that. Aaron Rodgers seems to be calling out the playcallers and gameplanners in post-game comments, and for good reason; but as I’ve been saying all along, this isn’t a great team and most people can’t seem to understand that. I just thought the defense was the sole reason why…

-Did the Raiders really come one bad holding call from beating the Patriots?

-Expected outcome in New Orleans, but did my fantasy TE (Kyle Rudolph) need to end up injured? There’s voodoo in that city. Nobody wants to talk about it, but it’s there.

-Whatever happening in the Giants-Texans game, makes no sense. None of it. Except Ryan Fitzpatrick throwing three INTs. That makes perfect sense.

-Redskins have their franchise quarterback. A steal in the 5th round.

-St. Louis are now officially bottom-dwellers in the NFC West. No more talk about how much fight they have. You can’t close out the Cowboys? You can’t win any moral victories. Ask Jerry Jones, he knows.

-What is wrong with the 49ers? Is it just the injuries? I can’t tell.

-Broncos-Seahawks. What a game.

-Really, Carolina? Really?

Jets. Haha.

Weekly Awards

Sike! You thought that was all I had to say?

What else is going on?

Well, the way things are shaping up, no team is really making a strong claim for being the best in either conference.

Except for the Bengals.

Yes, the Bengals. After three games, they’re averaging somewhere around 28 points for and 11 points against. Their defense held those 56-point Falcons to 10. They’ve manhandled teams, outperforming them in all three phases. I want to see what better competition does against ’em, but right now, Cincinnati hosts the best team in football.

What’s that, Seahawks fans? Well, you can’t lose on the road. It’s not beneficial. You’re still the team to beat in the NFC if I was forced to pick one, but there’s this team in Philadelphia who haven’t lost yet…

What’s that, Broncos fans? Well, you’re not nearly as dominant as you were in 2013. Not yet. Once your defense starts to click (which is happening more and more each week) and your offense finds balance and the ability to dominate like they can, you’ll be in good shape. Great shape, actually. Superbowl shape. But if the Bengals are for real…you’ve essentially got the Seahawks of the AFC in your way. That defense is no joke.

What’s that, Patriots fans? You just came a play from losing to the Raiders. I don’t want to hear anything out of you.

What’s that, Eagles fans? Play four quarters and put a better defense on the field, and then we’ll talk. Still, 3-0 is 3-0.

What’s that, rest of the NFL? Good luck.

Why Doesn’t Kev Speak On The Ray Rice/Adrian Peterson/Roger Goodell/Non-football situations in the NFL?

Because I’m not qualified, and neither are 90% of the people doing so. I have opinions, but I choose to reserve them to conversations. This is a format for discussing the game, not the mistakes, smart choices, etc, of NFL employees away from the game. But, if you want a quick summary, I’ll give it to you. Just this once. Probably just this once.

-Ray Rice should be in jail. Let him back in the league after he serves his time and shows Michael Vick-level repentance.

-Adrian Peterson should be in jail. Let him back in the league after he serves his time and shows Ray Rice-level repentance.

-Roger Goodell should be in…his house, watching someone else doing his job. I’m talking a temporary leave of absence, self-imposed, to allow league executives to format a better disciplinary policy without his interference. These decisions should never rest with one man. Especially not this man. He’s proven his incompetency numerous times, so let’s just call it like it is and do something about it. Sound good? Of course not. Makes too much sense.

Weekly Awards

For real.

QB Of The Week: Captain Kirk (Cousins). Sharing it with his opposite, Nick Foles. Both played their hearts out and solidified their positions as their team’s starting QB going forward. I just think Kirk did a little more, considering his situation.

RB Of The Week: Nobody ran harder than Rashad Jennings did for the Giants. 170+ yards is tough against a solid defense, and he was the catalyst (along with Houston’s turnovers) in giving the Giants a rare and needed win.

WR Of The Week: Andy Dalton. Hey, did you see that catch and run for a touchdown? Yeah, yeah. I know, it was one play. But we’re allowed to have a little fun here, aren’t we? Otherwise, this goes to Julio Jones, and that is boring in comparison.

Offensive Line Of The Week: If you saw the Steelers game, you know who gets this award. Dominant against a dominant defense. It’s easy to give props to the Giants, whose patchwork line managed to mostly maintain to the point of attack against a strong Texans front seven. Honorable mention to the Chargers’ front five for doing much of the same against the Bills.

Defensive Performance Of The Week: Whatever the Packers did or did not do on their way to one measly touchdown, the Lions’ D were all over the place. Watching LB Stephen Tulloch tear his ACL while celebrating gives them a bit of comedic edge in this category, as well. Good job, brah.

Goat Of The Week: Officiating crew, Jets-Bears. They absolutely took a win from the Jets. This sort of performance deserves more than back-room reprimands and a drop down some list nobody ever sees. It deserves demotion.

Coaching Performance Of The Week: Mike Tomlin and the rest of Pittsburgh’s staff had to right the ship after a bad loss against division rival Baltimore, and they called a wonderful game against the superior Panthers. It starts with gameplanning, and the Steelers had as good a plan as any this week.

What’s Next

Giants-Redskins will be better than most Thursday Night games. Tune in.

Packers are struggling. The Bears are banged up. Who wins? Who indeed.

Things will get violent in Baltimore as the Panthers come to town. Steve Smith has been ready since he left Carolina.

Dolphins lose, and I’m writing them a very stern letter. Wouldn’t be the first time.

San Fransisco better put their game face on. Seriously, this time. I mean it. Time to be one of the best teams in the league, fellas.

Because one of the best teams in the league is coming.

I’m on the record early: The Cowboys will upset the Saints.

On A Side Note…

I’m still playing fantasy football. I remember talking about this last year, so here’s my roster right now:

QB: Matthew Stafford (Lions)
RB: Monte Ball (Broncos), Trent Richardson (Colts), Khiry Robinson (Saints)Darren McFadden (Raiders), Bernard Pierce (Ravens)
WR: Dez Bryant (Cowboys), Julian Edelman (Patriots), Vincent Jackson (Buccaneers), Andre Johnson (Texans)
TE: Kyle Rudolph (Vikings), Ladarius Green (Chargers)
K: Dan Bailey (Cowboys)
DEF: Seattle Seahawks, Atlanta Falcons (Bye-week replacement)

Analysis: I’m 2-1, losing this week due almost exclusively to Matthew Stafford blowing it against the Packers. On the surface, this roster is a mixed bag. Looking deeper…it’s a mixed bag. So far, Bryant has been my most consistent performer. He and Edelman give me a solid 1-2 at the position. Obviously, my RBs leave something to be desired, and I’ll be looking to make a trade here this week or next. Rudolph’s injury leaves me weak at TE for the immediate future, so I may have to scour the waiver wire there. Otherwise, I like this team. I wasn’t able to draft it, so I have to pat the auto-draft system on the back. A better RB option instead of Andre Johnson/Vincent Jackson would have been nice, though.

Until next week…I leave you as I was left at the end of Week 3:



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